Leave Us

Head under water
And you tell moi
To breathe easy for awhile
The breathing gets harder
Made room for me
It’s too soon to see
If I’m happy in your hands
I’m unusually hard to hold on to
Blank stares at blank pages
No easy way to say this
You mean well but you make this hard on me
I learnt the hard way
That they all she said
Things you I wanna hear
My heavy heart sinks deep down under
You and your twisted words
Your help just hurts
You are not what I thought you were
Hello to high and dry
Convinced me to please you
Made me think that I need this too
I’m trying to let you hear me as I am
Promise me
You’ll leave the light on
To help me see
The daylight my guide, gone
Cause I believe
There’s a way
You can love me
Because I say
I’m not gonna write you a love song
Cause you asked for it
Cause you need one
You see, I’m not gonna write you a love song
Cause you tell me it’s make or breakin’ this
Is that why you wanted a love song?
If you’re on your way
I’m not gonna write you to stay
If your heart is nowhere in it
I don’t want it for a minute
Babe, I walked the seven seas
When I believe that there’s a reason to write you a love song


Went to Sogo with Roha for lunch at Kyros Kebab, her favourite. My lamb croissant is anything but easy to hold. She told me that to eat a croissant sandwich even if it’s tuna is with fork and knife. I learnt it from her the right way I should think, how to eat fish and chips. Then again, I thought sandwich is supposed to be finger food. Then we went shoe-hunting. I saw this red peep toe pair with black heels that I would wear if I ever dated the new N, and a pair of metallic black with bandage straps. Preppy because its front is rounded instead of my usual liking of pointy front but totally high enough to strut, baby, strut it! I just lurve jeans with heels. Talking about heels, I actually need to find gold strappy ones for Roha’s wedding. Seeing that my budget is straining harder than ever, and that Mum won’t loan me until I finished the Levi’s jeans payment, let’s put priority first (as if).

During our lunch I mentioned to Roha that I wanted to meet my glam aunt but I don’t know how to go to her house (as usual, the missing sense of direction). The perfume counter of Sogo that screamed Estee Lauder and Dior reminds me of her although she’s more of a Ferragamo fan. Then Mum called up and said that my aunt is at home with my recently finished-her-degree cousin (my aunt’s daughter). I was so happy that, Alhamdulillah HE made it happened for moi, I feel like Blair when she said thank you again and again to the above after she confirmed with the jeweller that her reserved necklace has been picked up presumably by Nate.

After picking up the curtains at Nagoya, we went straight back to Roha’s place, and I packed up and hugged her for the wondrous sport. And that I am actually and still is now craving for the CKT. Next time I’m definitely going for it.

“There will be one morning you akan wake up with this kind of energy that make you feel sooo lega. You’ll be alrite.” –Ari Gold Roha

So I got home happily seeing the orange NEO parked in my Mum’s porch. Najwa greeted me and asked when did I cut my hair. “Banyak benda berubah ever since aku menjanda, babe.” she laughed. I arrived around 3pm like that and it started to rain. My aunt was all about my hair and asked me where I had it cut. The madams were just finished with their Zuhur prayers, and Mum’s room had the air-cond on. She lined up the pillows on the snuggly rug and not more than twenty minutes of catching up and my Mum telling the story of her conversation with a stroke sufferer animatedly, Mum, aunt, Najwa and I dozed off for two hours. Bliss.

Later we all got up, Asar prayers and all that and I fixed something in the kitchen to eat (hungry siot!). Najwa indulged herself with the Internet connection since she is yet to set up one at her home. During the in-betweens, Najwa told moi that during her final project, one of the girls broke up too. She keeps crying and the whole team decided to eat, live, and sleep beramai-ramai in the studio so they can take care of her and finish the final project altogether. Roha actually decided to do my assignment (which I still haven’t submitted it), she said her sister’s friends co-operated together to finished up her assignments so that she will pass the paper – of course, during the break up.

“Even without the arwah, you’re already just good being with your family.” -Roha.


Please always remember that you are not in any position to ask and request and tell people what to do. I was the last person in the list because they have left you way earlier and been telling me to do the same.